by Amy L. Hatch
There are lots and lots of opinions out there about revealing your baby’s gender — or even finding out whether you’re having a boy or girl — when you’re pregnant.
Some people are purists, and they wait for that moment when the doctor takes a peek at the goods and announces to one and all present, “It’s a girl!” or “It’s a boy!”
Some people are secret-keepers. They find out the gender with the 20-week sonogram, but they don’t tell anyone. They play it close to the vest and surprise everyone — except themselves — on the big day.
Then there are the blabbers. They can’t wait to find out what flavor they’re getting and they announce it to one and all (and maybe Twitter) the minute that kid lets the tech get the money shot.
We were blabbers. We couldn’t help it, we were so excited. Especially when we found out that our first was going to be a girl. My dad was in the final stages of cancer, and I am so glad we told him he was having a granddaughter and what her name was going to be, because he never met her.
Everyone has their reasons for how they deal with this modern pregnancy dilemma, be they emotional, sentimental, practical (so much easier to shop!) or even religious.
But even I have to draw the line at revealing your kid’s gender with … wait for it … a cake.
I saw this latest trend (fad? craze? sign of the apocalypse?) on Twitter, and I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Yes, my friends, if you weren’t sure how to break the big news to your family and friends, you can have a Baby Gender Reveal Cake Party!
Here’s how they do it: Parents-to-be ask their sono tech to hand them an envelope with the baby’s gender inside. The parents, in turn, hand the envelope to their neighborhood baker. The baker looks in the envelope and bakes a cake, which is tinted either pink or blue.
When mom and dad cut into the confection, all is revealed for one and all to see. Like this:
Seriously, who does this?
Not to judge (oh, hell, I’m judging, whatever), but this takes the current cult of parenting narcissism to a whole new level. Gathering 50 of your closest pals to find out what color you should paint the nursery strikes me as a pretty big leap to make about how many people really give a hoot about your kid’s gender.
I mean, I get that grandma might be pretty psyched. But your neighbor? Not so much.
And let’s examine for a moment, shall we, what happens when that food coloring isn’t the tint you’d hoped for. When we had our second child, I was convinced we were having another girl. That initial shock of seeing boy parts on that screen isn’t something I’d want to share with anyone besides my husband.
And I definitely would not want it recorded and posted on YouTube for posterity.
There are so many private moments that we already share. The lure of posting exciting news — no matter how personal — on Facebook or Twitter can be irrestistible. Pregnancy and birth are custom-made for social media. I mean, we all feel like we’re the first people to ever do it, right? Even when we do it more than once.
It’s fun. It feels good to be the center of attention sometimes. We love our babies and we’re beyond excited about introducing them to the world.
Their big entrance deserves a to be a little more dignified, don’t you think?
Amy L. Hatch is a co-founder and editor of chambanamoms.com, and she does really love cake. She can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.